7/19/13

An Essay on Equal Conscious Partnership

An Essay on Equal Conscious Partnership

July 19, 2013 at 12:20am

I had a very good day today, and it was a day different than many other good days I have encountered. Many of my previous good days have included activities like scampering through tropical paradises and dancing my face off at music festivals surrounded by people experiencing substance induced heart expansion. Today my good day included spinning a four year old around the pool and learning how to properly cut a pepper for dicing in the kitchen with my Beloved. My good day today was highlighted with an amazing farm-to-fork dinner cooked by my sweet man and enjoyed with family. This was topped off with an amazing after dinner spontaneous dance party with the four year old and two year old, dressed to impress, to Micheal Franti's jam 'I Love You'. If it couldn't get any cuter, this dance party ended in a big cuddle puddle group hug and shared kisses all around. I also discovered on this very good day that in the time it takes for Daddy to give his girls a bath, I can clean the kitchen/wash dishes post dinner explosion, rotate the laundry AND sweep the floor. Boom.
Conscious Partnership.
Now, the Beloved and I sit here while I type feeding each other bits of dark chocolate and tangy mango.
That's what I call teamwork.

I realize this is the root. Allowing the two to act as individuals moving as one unit in the same direction. One puts kids in bath, other cleans kitchen, work is done, both can relax and move on to time together and/or creative outlet.

There is a different kind of partnership in the world today. This is the Equal Conscious Partnership.
I am writing this essay in real time.
In this moment I am reading a message from the mother of my Beloved's children.
She says she loves me, honors me, and accepts me. She is grateful for who I am choosing to be.
This is the greatest aspect of Equal Conscious Partnership...being equal conscious partners with the Beloveds previous partners, or new partners, or perhaps even multiple partners. Recognizing that there is no ownership or possession, but only the desire to create a resonate field with all. There is no separation.

If one is taken care of, all are taken care of. If all are taken care of, then each has the strength to continue to take care.

In the past I have witnessed in many relationships, including my own, the tendency to become co-dependent. This means blaming the other person for anything ever. This means losing yourself in the blur of others needs. This means angry outbursts due to lack of communication. This means holding someone else responsible for your own emotions. This means heavy lessons learned in pain. This is the opposite of an Inter-Dependent Equal Conscious Partnership.

In present moment I have witnessed in many relationships, including my own, the tendency to be continually experiencing and moving in the direction of Inter-Dependency. This means having a conversation that is civil with an open heart and an open mind about anything that may be of concern to anyone involved. This means being responsible for your own emotions and thoughts, and dealing with them outside of the others space when emotionally charged. This means creating time in your own day to feel purposeful and on point, as to disassemble any resentment building over lack of personal development time. This means Equality. This means Conscious. This is the new paradigm on which lovers, partners, parents, neighbors, co-workers and friends are operating from. For this, I am incredibly grateful.

Non-violent communication is key. Being able to identify needs through feelings and determine if I can solve it myself or if it needs to be a simple conversation has been a great tool. Listening.
Speaking in a respectful tone. Listening.
Being silent even if there is no reason to be just to listen a little harder. To wait if they have just one more word about it. Listening.
The other key to Equal Conscious Partnership.
Each one has a chance to speak, each one has the responsibility of listening. Two ears...One mouth <3 p="">
Self Love. I love myself so much. I don't need a man and I don't really 'want' one because if I was without I would be alone. I am in acceptance of the beauty and surprise God brings my way, and more often that not, my curiosity leads me into the rabbit role of romantic partnership. I AM a Scorpio after all. A monogamous one, at that. So this means I like to have my relationship on lock. When I am in one I am fully, wholly and kindheartedly loyally IN ONE. So, my task is to walk that fine line of being the independent free dancing wild spirit that I am, while maintaining Equality in my Conscious Partnership. I love myself enough to know when I need to make requests for personal space, allowing room in my schedule for the freedom to travel, while respecting the needs of my Beloved. These conversations are always pleasant and I never feel pushed or obligated to be anything other than what I am. This is important because in the past I felt addicted to love and thought I could change the parts of myself that did not fit the others mold. This leads to the co-dependent dance that oozes the slime of resentment and remorse. Remorse no more! Today was also a good day because not only did I accomplish supporting family life, I also made time to write this essay, hoop dance, work on my tan, swim a few laps and make love <3 heart.="" in="" is="" joy="" my="" only="" p="" present="">
This unlocks the third key I have realized create the key ring of Equal Conscious Partnership. Joy.
FOLLOW THE JOY!
Of course there are moments when the joy can be neutralized through a counter balancing experience, but as long as one never lets any moment rob them of their overall joy, one is able to sustain Love.
Once one can sustain Love, one feels equal. One feels conscious.
Follow the joy.
Never the pain.
Let the pain be an indicator. A joy barometer. Ask yourself, is your heart feeling open to love?
Or is there a smallness present, a tightness with lack of space?
The heart is full of empty chambers and secret compartments.
Allowing fear to nudge up against the doors to those rooms reminds you that they are there...
and invitation to Open. Open. Open.
Fear moves and motivates.                     Run Free!

Equal Conscious Partnership is fun. It is empowering. It is SEXY.
There is always the ability to practice being an Equal Conscious Partner with every interaction you have with anyone in your life. Everyone is the Beloved....especially those closest to you.
Love God inside yourself, Love God inside another.

The perspective is what matters most.
Love yourself and an Equal. Love the 'Other' as an Equal.
Then, you will soon see the Truth.
There is no other, the other is another You <3 p="">In Lakesh. Al akine.
I am another You.

From this perspective, we are in perfect unison as we learn and grow together....
My, what a beautiful garden <3 p="">
Until next time....
Be the Love.

Shellie White Light  ~ 7/18/13